Infant and Child Loss is a topic which does get attention and awareness as much as it deserves. It’s tough to talk about a miscarriage or a child who only stayed on this planet for a few hours. A mom who had her lost baby daughter in her arms for a short time before passing away has a similar experience.
Alyssa Young and her husband were extremely happy for their first child, whom they named as Scarlett. Alyssa’s pregnancy was considered high risk because she had cerebral palsy and type 2 diabetes, so she went for checkups more often than most.
At 19 weeks, all was going along fine. “I had routine ultrasound. Scarlett was perfect. She was robust and wonderful, weighing 14 ounces and with a heart rate of 131. She was my pride and delight when I was 19 weeks and 6 days pregnant.”
Though the ultrasound showed that Scarlett was growing and healthy, immediately after the appointment, Alyssa was in excruciating agony, far worse than she had been throughout her last pregnancy.
Doctors said that she and Scarlett were fine but Alyssa had a mother’s instinct that something was wrong. Alyssa was rushed to the Labor & Delivery ward where doctors explained the reason behind Alyssa’s unusual amount of pain.
“When we arrived at the hospital, the kind nurses made sure I was comfortable… The on-call obstetrician came in to examine me after I was settled in. He said I had either an incompetent cervix or my body was attempting to miscarry our precious baby daughter.”
The doctors performed an ultrasound to make sure the baby was fine and healthy but despite the magnesium in the body, Alyssa’s cervix continued to expand.
She was suffering from cervical incompetence which is a condition that affects 1 in every 100 women. Scarlett was just too little to endure the lengthy labor at 20 weeks and 5 days.
Young’s husband made sure that everyone in the family was present for the procedure to say hello and farewell to their daughter Scarlett.
Special two hours of Scarlett with her family was captured by her own grandmother. Scarlett was only able to last two hours, but her mother is encouraging others to come out and speak out about cervical incompetence.
Alyssa describes Scarlett’s birth, and her brief, precious life outside the womb:
“As I held her, she gasped for breath. I told her that I was so sorry. I told her I loved her. I assured her that it was fine to let go. It’s a dreadful feeling to see your child die and know there’s nothing you can do to save them. You are powerless. Each person took a turn holding her. Everyone fell in love with her. That’s all she ever experienced was love.”
Scarlett survived peacefully with her loved ones for two hours before she passed away.
Alyssa wants to give her baby’s life more meaning by encouraging other women to speak up about miscarriage, stillbirth, infant loss, and cervical incompetence. Alyssa wants to give her kid a better life by encouraging other women to speak up about miscarriage, stillbirth, infant loss, and cervical incompetence.